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The better question would be what is your definition of happiness? It’s clear that it can have a different meaning for each of us. There is no simple, one-size-fits-all answer to what makes us happy. Research indicates that a happy person is someone who experiences frequent positive emotions, and infrequently (though not absent), negative emotions. Happiness is also related to life satisfaction.
Have you ever met someone who is always positive, and a joy to be around – someone with tons of energy, and who can see the positive in everything? They are seemingly always ready to take on any challenge and nothing is insurmountable. They have answers for seemingly difficult problems and do not seem to get phased by anything.
What kind of information do you like to fill your mind with? Do you find yourself constantly reading the tabloids, or social media, only to find there is a horrific story that upsets you? Or perhaps you get caught up in other people’s opinions and conversations and find yourself agreeing to things that you actually don’t agree with!
Did you know that you are heavily influenced by the people you surround yourself with on a regular basis? In fact, you pick up on behaviour, mannerisms, opinions, beliefs and a ton of other information that your brain unconsciously absorbs, which can have a huge impact on your own behaviour.
I wondered what I could do to make a difference and contribute to the World. There are so many horror stories about the state the planet is in and feeling helpless (in my own experience) achieves absolutely nothing.
I wondered what impact I might make, would it be significant enough? What if significant was a simple gesture, a step, an action, an act of kindness, a donation of time or money?
I knew I was drawn to a bigger purpose and that it would continue to nag away at me until I did something about it.
It's time to step up and take a reality check.
If you perceive your life to be s**t and you are fed up with it being s**t, then it's time to stop blaming everyone and everything for what's wrong. Take responsibility for yourself. To quote Ghandi: Be the change that you wish to see in the world.
When we realise that the relationship that we’ve been having with ourselves is toxic, we become aware that many of our relationships with other people are mirrored and take on similar patterns. You cannot have a healthy relationship with anyone whilst you harbour a toxic relationship with self.
The belief that you are good enough isn’t something that anyone can give you. It starts by becoming aware of the problem - developing self-awareness. Then we can observe and reframe the relationship by changing our thoughts and behaviour.
I made the choice in December 2016 that I was going to make 2017 a very different year. I have never been so ready to embrace change and knew that nothing would deter me from my objective. I was going to take my tool box and use the tools in a new way. Instead of reaching for them when I needed them, I was going to use them to prevent feeling stress and burnout.
There were also some other tweaks that I had been thinking about implementing for a while but never felt brave enough.
I was curious about how life would be if I decided not to drink for 12 months. Truthfully, the very idea scared me, but honestly my relationship with alcohol wasn't as healthy as I liked to think it was. I typically would only drink at weekends unless I was on holiday or there was a special occasion, but from time to time the weekend extended to Thursday nights. I knew deep down that I was using alcohol as a distraction or avoidance tactic. On top of which I didn't like the effect it had on my mental well-being.
People often ask me how I stay so positive all of the time.
My response is this: I am usually positive, but my positivity levels vary, so I work on myself. When I say that I work at it, I don't mean that I try to be positive, I am naturally positive, always have been, even in the most adverse of circumstances. I think I have always intuitively known that being positive is better for my mental health.